Monday, 9 May 2011
Einstein was wrong
I'm the Speed of Light. And I've been neglecting this due to exams and revision and things so I'm sorry. Don't worry, and argument about Arkham Asylum will be up soon :-)
Thursday, 28 April 2011
Who watches the Watchmen?
Please note, the following blog post contains spoilers regarding Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons
"The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and the politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!'... and I'll look down and whisper 'no.'"
When looking at the "Can comic books be literature?" argument Watchmen is the obvious place to start, if no other reason than its reputation. Watchmen is considered by many to be the greatest comic book of all time (also by some to be the most overrated of all time) and appeared on the Time magazine 100 greatest novels of all time. Not the graphic novel section, the novels. Watchmen is also helpful in disproving the myth that Comic books are for children. Look at the line at the top of the page; is a 'children's' medium really going to claim that as the pinnacle of it's aspirations? There are children's comics, just like there are children's books, tv shows, films and all other kinds of art; and there are comics suitable for children, just as there are books suitable for children, tv shows, films etc etc, but there are also more mature comic books and I don't mean in a vulgar, explicit way.
So, having got that out of the way we can turn to Watchmen in it's own right as a work of fiction somewhere between prose and drama. This is where comic books muddy the water; they are strictly speaking prose but written in drama form. They are not intended to be performed, the artwork is the performance in that sense, but the artwork is intrinsically part of the art form. What people assume is that because the artwork is there the writing can afford to be... of less merit than other written fiction. The only comics which subscribe to this view are bad ones, often discontinued ones. And there can be no claims that the writing in Watchmen takes second place to the artwork.
Watchmen deals with a dark mirror of our own world in 1985, a world where costumed adventurers began to fight crime in the 1930s and 40s, where the US won the war in Vietnam and where Richard Nixon manipulated law and popular will to be elected for a third term as President of the United States. Just as a concept that it's interesting; not the costumed heroes but the "What if America had won the Vietnam war?" scenario sets this book up as one which is going to ask a lot of questions. And the questions we ask ourselves as we read it are deep, dark and thought provoking. "What would I do" we ask ourselves "In this world that Alan Moore has created here?" For those of us of my generation, people who never lived through the cold war, Watchmen manages to bring home the cold realities of nuclear war and how close we came to the end of all life on Earth. The scene where Richard Nixon consults his advisors on the results of a nuclear strike on Russia after the USSR invades Afghanistan and seriously considers sacrificing the entire Eastern Seaboard is numbingly cold as you realise that is the kind of conversation that would have happened at that time. When Captain Metropolis begs his fellow heroes to stay, pleading that "Someone has to save the world" we realise that he is absolutely right, just as Veidt does.
To try to cover all the themes in Watchmen is impossible in a blog; if I ever write a proper essay or dissertation on the comic book, literature question I'll cover them then, but one which does stand out is the oldest story in the world, the struggle between good and evil. And as all the cliched stories in the world would have us believe the heroes we have been following throughout the book confront the mastermind behind the horrors they have faced at the moment of his grand victory, and what do they do? They give up. There's nothing they can do, in the face of what their enemy has achieved, except accept it, join him and help to build a better world. Only one of them is unwilling to give up "Not even in the face of armageddon. Never compromise" he tells us and we watch as he goes out to fight the good fight on his own. He is killed within 4 pages.
And so we come to the biggest question which the book raises. We have good, and we have evil; heroes and villains. On the one side we have Ozymandias. On the other Rorschach. And I'm damned if I can figure out which side is which.
Let's consider Ozymandias. Adrian Veidt, the smartest man in the world. This man became a hero because he felt he needed to. Everything he does is altruism. None of the other characters, the people who know him best in the world, believe he is capable of evil. All he wants to do is save the world. So what does he do? He murders one of his colleagues, systematically infects all the closest associates of another with terminal cancer to drive him off planet, has a third framed for murder, arrested and imprisoned, fakes an assassination attempt on himself and kills three and a half million people. Surely that is evil, and yet in doing so he ends the cold war, prevents the possibility of a nuclear holocaust and saves the world.
And then we have Rorschach. We have followed Rorschach since the beginning; his are the first words we read, the first voice we hear. He fights for what he believes is right, defends the innocent, refuses to compromise even in the face of the apocalypse, never gives in, never backs down, has risen from adversity to to be hero. But how does he go about all this. Through the book we see him torture and intimidate, murder and mutilate anyone who crosses him or the law. And when Rorschach refuses to compromise to make sure the world stays safe then it makes us as readers wonder whether we would stand by our principles even if it meant watching the world burn. When he walks away he walks alone, without his friends but also without the reader; we may not like what Veidt has done but we cannot find the strength of will to walk away from it, because he has saved the world.
Good and Evil are blurred into so many shades of grey that no reader can know what they would do in the place of the characters. But the greatest moment of Watchmen comes at the climax of what was the penultimate issue. Nite Owl and Rorschach confront Ozymandias and anyone who knows anything of the way stories should work can see what should come next: Ozymandias will reveal his plan and then the heroes will stop him just in the nick of time. It's a cliche not just of comics but of all science fiction, action and thrillers. And true to form Moore has Ozymandias reveal his plan to Nite Owl and Rorschach, and we see how ingrained thoughout the plot it is. Every moment is revisited, every plot twist unravelled, every flashback justified and as we begin to comprehend the scale of what Veidt has been planning, Nite Owl and Rorschach tell him that it's over, that they're going to stop him. And then, in just seven words, Alan Moore defies convention, destroys the cliche and delivers the greatest plot twist in the history of comic books.
"I did it thirty-five minutes ago"
And that's it. No way to stop him. He's won. Watchmen is a book which defies convention, asks questions about morality, humanity and justice which we don't want to ask ourselves. It's a book which gives us so much to think about that we can't help but return to it, hoping that maybe this time we'll see who's good, who's evil; who's right and who's wrong, but we never will and that's the beauty of it. It keeps us asking questions until we realise that the only way to answer them is to try to save the world ourselves and see what's right. It's a book which changes the way we think. If that isn't Literature, nothing is.
"The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and the politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!'... and I'll look down and whisper 'no.'"
When looking at the "Can comic books be literature?" argument Watchmen is the obvious place to start, if no other reason than its reputation. Watchmen is considered by many to be the greatest comic book of all time (also by some to be the most overrated of all time) and appeared on the Time magazine 100 greatest novels of all time. Not the graphic novel section, the novels. Watchmen is also helpful in disproving the myth that Comic books are for children. Look at the line at the top of the page; is a 'children's' medium really going to claim that as the pinnacle of it's aspirations? There are children's comics, just like there are children's books, tv shows, films and all other kinds of art; and there are comics suitable for children, just as there are books suitable for children, tv shows, films etc etc, but there are also more mature comic books and I don't mean in a vulgar, explicit way.
So, having got that out of the way we can turn to Watchmen in it's own right as a work of fiction somewhere between prose and drama. This is where comic books muddy the water; they are strictly speaking prose but written in drama form. They are not intended to be performed, the artwork is the performance in that sense, but the artwork is intrinsically part of the art form. What people assume is that because the artwork is there the writing can afford to be... of less merit than other written fiction. The only comics which subscribe to this view are bad ones, often discontinued ones. And there can be no claims that the writing in Watchmen takes second place to the artwork.
Watchmen deals with a dark mirror of our own world in 1985, a world where costumed adventurers began to fight crime in the 1930s and 40s, where the US won the war in Vietnam and where Richard Nixon manipulated law and popular will to be elected for a third term as President of the United States. Just as a concept that it's interesting; not the costumed heroes but the "What if America had won the Vietnam war?" scenario sets this book up as one which is going to ask a lot of questions. And the questions we ask ourselves as we read it are deep, dark and thought provoking. "What would I do" we ask ourselves "In this world that Alan Moore has created here?" For those of us of my generation, people who never lived through the cold war, Watchmen manages to bring home the cold realities of nuclear war and how close we came to the end of all life on Earth. The scene where Richard Nixon consults his advisors on the results of a nuclear strike on Russia after the USSR invades Afghanistan and seriously considers sacrificing the entire Eastern Seaboard is numbingly cold as you realise that is the kind of conversation that would have happened at that time. When Captain Metropolis begs his fellow heroes to stay, pleading that "Someone has to save the world" we realise that he is absolutely right, just as Veidt does.
To try to cover all the themes in Watchmen is impossible in a blog; if I ever write a proper essay or dissertation on the comic book, literature question I'll cover them then, but one which does stand out is the oldest story in the world, the struggle between good and evil. And as all the cliched stories in the world would have us believe the heroes we have been following throughout the book confront the mastermind behind the horrors they have faced at the moment of his grand victory, and what do they do? They give up. There's nothing they can do, in the face of what their enemy has achieved, except accept it, join him and help to build a better world. Only one of them is unwilling to give up "Not even in the face of armageddon. Never compromise" he tells us and we watch as he goes out to fight the good fight on his own. He is killed within 4 pages.
And so we come to the biggest question which the book raises. We have good, and we have evil; heroes and villains. On the one side we have Ozymandias. On the other Rorschach. And I'm damned if I can figure out which side is which.
Let's consider Ozymandias. Adrian Veidt, the smartest man in the world. This man became a hero because he felt he needed to. Everything he does is altruism. None of the other characters, the people who know him best in the world, believe he is capable of evil. All he wants to do is save the world. So what does he do? He murders one of his colleagues, systematically infects all the closest associates of another with terminal cancer to drive him off planet, has a third framed for murder, arrested and imprisoned, fakes an assassination attempt on himself and kills three and a half million people. Surely that is evil, and yet in doing so he ends the cold war, prevents the possibility of a nuclear holocaust and saves the world.
And then we have Rorschach. We have followed Rorschach since the beginning; his are the first words we read, the first voice we hear. He fights for what he believes is right, defends the innocent, refuses to compromise even in the face of the apocalypse, never gives in, never backs down, has risen from adversity to to be hero. But how does he go about all this. Through the book we see him torture and intimidate, murder and mutilate anyone who crosses him or the law. And when Rorschach refuses to compromise to make sure the world stays safe then it makes us as readers wonder whether we would stand by our principles even if it meant watching the world burn. When he walks away he walks alone, without his friends but also without the reader; we may not like what Veidt has done but we cannot find the strength of will to walk away from it, because he has saved the world.
Good and Evil are blurred into so many shades of grey that no reader can know what they would do in the place of the characters. But the greatest moment of Watchmen comes at the climax of what was the penultimate issue. Nite Owl and Rorschach confront Ozymandias and anyone who knows anything of the way stories should work can see what should come next: Ozymandias will reveal his plan and then the heroes will stop him just in the nick of time. It's a cliche not just of comics but of all science fiction, action and thrillers. And true to form Moore has Ozymandias reveal his plan to Nite Owl and Rorschach, and we see how ingrained thoughout the plot it is. Every moment is revisited, every plot twist unravelled, every flashback justified and as we begin to comprehend the scale of what Veidt has been planning, Nite Owl and Rorschach tell him that it's over, that they're going to stop him. And then, in just seven words, Alan Moore defies convention, destroys the cliche and delivers the greatest plot twist in the history of comic books.
"I did it thirty-five minutes ago"
And that's it. No way to stop him. He's won. Watchmen is a book which defies convention, asks questions about morality, humanity and justice which we don't want to ask ourselves. It's a book which gives us so much to think about that we can't help but return to it, hoping that maybe this time we'll see who's good, who's evil; who's right and who's wrong, but we never will and that's the beauty of it. It keeps us asking questions until we realise that the only way to answer them is to try to save the world ourselves and see what's right. It's a book which changes the way we think. If that isn't Literature, nothing is.
Wednesday, 27 April 2011
Art and Literature
Can comic books be literature? It's a question that's been around for a while and, to be honest, I don't think anyone has ever come up with a proper answer. This is because, for the most part, people have been concentrating on the question "Are comic books literature?" rather than "Can they BE literature?". And the answer is that most comics, like most books, aren't literature. They can be good, but that doesn't make them literature. So what I'm going to do, over my next couple of blogs, is take some specific examples, some comic books and graphic novels, and argue that in individual cases comic books can be literature. I'll be arguing that books like "The Killing Joke", "Arkham Asylum, a Serious House on Serious Earth", "Watchmen" and "Batman, the Long Halloween" can be seen as literature if we stop looking at the issue as a polarising one where all comics either are or aren't literature. (I'm aware that what I've listed are DC publications, but as I write I find it harder to find Marvel comics that stand alone and which I am familiar enough with to argue, although I do not doubt that there are ones. Similarly I'm not familiar enough with 2000AD publications, Neil Gaiman's Sandman series or any other works which may be of literary calibre)
On the subject of whether they can be art, the answer is "Of course they can be", but the art world is more accepting of Comics as a part of their sphere of influence. Think about it, original comic artwork can be worth a lot of money, when was the last time an original comic script was considered of real value, or that comics were appreciated as art for the depth of the writing? That's the balance I want to redress here; to demonstrate that the writing of a comic book can be far greater than that of many books and can stand up as well as the artwork
On the subject of whether they can be art, the answer is "Of course they can be", but the art world is more accepting of Comics as a part of their sphere of influence. Think about it, original comic artwork can be worth a lot of money, when was the last time an original comic script was considered of real value, or that comics were appreciated as art for the depth of the writing? That's the balance I want to redress here; to demonstrate that the writing of a comic book can be far greater than that of many books and can stand up as well as the artwork
Saturday, 23 April 2011
The Reason I Don't Vlog
There is a simple reason I don't vlog. I have a lisp. Now normally that wouldn't stop me, I'd just say what the hell and go for it, but it's more complicated than that.
I have some reflex control over my lisp, in so far as I can make it less pronounced, but I can't do it consciously. When I'm on stage, or otherwise performing in front of an audience, that's when it's least pronounced, my subconscious sort of goes "Shit; he's not meant to be Julian at the moment, lose the lisp" and so, to an extent, I do. Then, when I'm just talking to people normally, it's fairly tame; it will pop up from time to time but mostly it's just an odd way of pronouncing the letter "s" rather than a full blown saying "th" or "sh" instead of "s". But when I'm on my ownm because I can't actually hear the lisp in my voice, there's no reason for me to try not to lisp. And since Vlogging to me is just talking to myself... also, I can hear my lisp really strongly in my voice when I hear it recorded. And it... sickens me
I have some reflex control over my lisp, in so far as I can make it less pronounced, but I can't do it consciously. When I'm on stage, or otherwise performing in front of an audience, that's when it's least pronounced, my subconscious sort of goes "Shit; he's not meant to be Julian at the moment, lose the lisp" and so, to an extent, I do. Then, when I'm just talking to people normally, it's fairly tame; it will pop up from time to time but mostly it's just an odd way of pronouncing the letter "s" rather than a full blown saying "th" or "sh" instead of "s". But when I'm on my ownm because I can't actually hear the lisp in my voice, there's no reason for me to try not to lisp. And since Vlogging to me is just talking to myself... also, I can hear my lisp really strongly in my voice when I hear it recorded. And it... sickens me
Wednesday, 20 April 2011
DORSET
So yeah, I'm back now from sunny Dorset (There is no way we would ever have had such good weather in August, it was incredible. Had to break out the factor 40 and everything). Did a lot of walking, saw a lot of awesome views, as you can see above this.
Lots of things I thought about while away; so blogs to look forward to, but today I want to rant about. This is (drum roll please)
The Prevalence of the Lemon in Modern Culinary Practice.
Why? Just Why?
Tuesday, 12 April 2011
FREEEEEDOM!!!!!
It's the Holidays! I Am Free! So blogging will become sporadic from now on
Those of you who are free, enjoy your freedom :)
Those of you who are free, enjoy your freedom :)
Monday, 11 April 2011
Lost in the Darkness
So, no blog on Saturday (sorry about that) because I have been rather a busy bee. Anyway, I was in Birmingham, seeing "Jekyll and Hyde" at the Hippodrome, and so that's what I'm going to talk about.
You see, there are three different types of good show that I see, and "Jekyll and Hyde" was most certainly the third type. The first type is the best kind of all, the kind of show where I just go "Wow!". David Tennant's Hamlet at the RSC springs to mind. Shows that just completely blow you away and leave you unable to think anything but "Wow!". Then there's type two. With type two I see a show and think "That was awesome, I'd love to play that part". A show becomes type two if I can actually think of how I would play a certain part. This is the most common type of show; it was Toby Stephens as Hamlet (Bloody good type two show years ago) that first got me into drama properly. Then there's type three, which is what "Jekyll and Hyde" was. Type three shows I watch and I think "This is a pretty good show. But I'd do it differently. That doesn't quite work, I'd try this instead". The thing is, if I see a show that I want to put on my own production of as soon as I've seen someone else's version of it then clearly, for me at least, their production was missing something.
I'd like to make it clear that Jekyll and Hyde was spectacular, no doubt about that. But I'd do it differently
You see, there are three different types of good show that I see, and "Jekyll and Hyde" was most certainly the third type. The first type is the best kind of all, the kind of show where I just go "Wow!". David Tennant's Hamlet at the RSC springs to mind. Shows that just completely blow you away and leave you unable to think anything but "Wow!". Then there's type two. With type two I see a show and think "That was awesome, I'd love to play that part". A show becomes type two if I can actually think of how I would play a certain part. This is the most common type of show; it was Toby Stephens as Hamlet (Bloody good type two show years ago) that first got me into drama properly. Then there's type three, which is what "Jekyll and Hyde" was. Type three shows I watch and I think "This is a pretty good show. But I'd do it differently. That doesn't quite work, I'd try this instead". The thing is, if I see a show that I want to put on my own production of as soon as I've seen someone else's version of it then clearly, for me at least, their production was missing something.
I'd like to make it clear that Jekyll and Hyde was spectacular, no doubt about that. But I'd do it differently
Friday, 8 April 2011
"Badass Welshman"
There's something wrong with that phrase. I'm fairly sure that when Edward I of England persuaded the Welsh that full union would be a good idea one of the terms and conditions was that the Welsh could not be badass, except while pretending to be "British". Longbowmen at Agincourt, Crecy and Poitiers are remembered for beating the French, not for having been most likely Welsh.
One of my Best friends is Welsh. Another of them is Scottish. And I have another good friend who is Irish. I myself am English (And according to my family tree have been for at least 500 years). If we ever went to the pub together I think the latent humour would cause the universe to implode or something. So far we've not caused any major structural damage to the fabric of reality though so that's ok. But it just goes to show that cross border co-operation in the UK can work, despite the claims of french national rugby team coach Marc Lievrement. And long may we continue to do so.
That was an odd blog. Sorry :-/
One of my Best friends is Welsh. Another of them is Scottish. And I have another good friend who is Irish. I myself am English (And according to my family tree have been for at least 500 years). If we ever went to the pub together I think the latent humour would cause the universe to implode or something. So far we've not caused any major structural damage to the fabric of reality though so that's ok. But it just goes to show that cross border co-operation in the UK can work, despite the claims of french national rugby team coach Marc Lievrement. And long may we continue to do so.
That was an odd blog. Sorry :-/
Thursday, 7 April 2011
So I didn't get cut out of a car yesterday because the fire crews had all been called out to a genuine traffic accident. Hope everyone involved is ok, but seriously, just my luck.
Sooooooooooooooooooo today I am going to try to defend a man who is almost universally despised. Yes, it's "Let's stop hating on Nick Clegg" day (ok, I made that up.)
Mr Clegg has been getting a lot of stick recently, particularly from people my age, for all sorts of reasons. So let's start at the beginning, with the General Election Last Year.
1. Nick Clegg's Liberal Democrats didn't do so well in the General Election as everyone thought they would. That's not his fault; that's yours for not voting for him (I say "yours" because I'm not legally allowed to vote being as I am 17)
2. Nick Clegg then despicably saved this country from anarchy by helping to form a Government WITH THE CONSERVATIVES!!!1ONE
Well what else was he going to do? Try for a "Rainbow Coalition" with Labour and the Small Parties? People are complaining enough about compromises now, imagine the compromises in a coalition of anything up to 10 different parties. And imagine if the Liberal Democrats had supported Labour, who had less votes and seats, who pissed them off royally at meetings and who were led by Gordon Brown, the least popular Prime Minister since Anthony Eden, with the support of Peter Mandelson. I'm not going to describe Peter Mandelson. Just give you a few pictures:
So yeah, keeping Labour in power? Not recommended
3. Nick Clegg then sold his soul to the Conservative party in exchange for a referendum and a few concessions. Firstlym there's a bit more than a few concessions; the Liberal's have a stronger cabinet presence than anyone could have imagined and have had a hand in liberalising every Conservative policy. Every one. And as for selling out to the Tories, he hasn't sold out for two reasons. Firstly, he has aligned himself with David Cameron. And David Cameron is the face of the the Tory left, which these days is about the same as the Liberal Right. The Old Social Democrats of the Liberal left can moan all they like, The Lib Dems are not a socialist party. Go and join Labour if you want that, now they've rediscovered themselves. And if Clegg had sold his soul to the Tory Right then we really would be screwed, because the Conservatives for the most part do not see Norman Tebbit as the font of all knowledge and policy. The far right of the Conservative party really are a different kettle of fish to the ones in Government. Would you ever have refused to support Tony Blair because you disagreed with Ken Livingstone, or vice versa? Then don't give up on Cameron because of Norman Tebbit
4. Nick Clegg lied to the nation when he said he would not raise tuition fees. Fact: the Liberal Manifesto said that "A Liberal Democrat Government" would not raise tuition fees. And this isn't a Liberal Democrat Government, it is a coalition and in coalition you have to make compromises. It was a stupid thing to promise in their manifesto (since the only defence left to them is that they didn't know they'd be in power when they wrote it) but they didn't lie and if you look at the proposals properly then they do make a lot of sense, especially for those with poorer backgrounds
So go easy on Clegg, yeah? He's not a bastard, just a guy trying to do his job
Sooooooooooooooooooo today I am going to try to defend a man who is almost universally despised. Yes, it's "Let's stop hating on Nick Clegg" day (ok, I made that up.)
Mr Clegg has been getting a lot of stick recently, particularly from people my age, for all sorts of reasons. So let's start at the beginning, with the General Election Last Year.
1. Nick Clegg's Liberal Democrats didn't do so well in the General Election as everyone thought they would. That's not his fault; that's yours for not voting for him (I say "yours" because I'm not legally allowed to vote being as I am 17)
2. Nick Clegg then despicably saved this country from anarchy by helping to form a Government WITH THE CONSERVATIVES!!!1ONE
Well what else was he going to do? Try for a "Rainbow Coalition" with Labour and the Small Parties? People are complaining enough about compromises now, imagine the compromises in a coalition of anything up to 10 different parties. And imagine if the Liberal Democrats had supported Labour, who had less votes and seats, who pissed them off royally at meetings and who were led by Gordon Brown, the least popular Prime Minister since Anthony Eden, with the support of Peter Mandelson. I'm not going to describe Peter Mandelson. Just give you a few pictures:
3. Nick Clegg then sold his soul to the Conservative party in exchange for a referendum and a few concessions. Firstlym there's a bit more than a few concessions; the Liberal's have a stronger cabinet presence than anyone could have imagined and have had a hand in liberalising every Conservative policy. Every one. And as for selling out to the Tories, he hasn't sold out for two reasons. Firstly, he has aligned himself with David Cameron. And David Cameron is the face of the the Tory left, which these days is about the same as the Liberal Right. The Old Social Democrats of the Liberal left can moan all they like, The Lib Dems are not a socialist party. Go and join Labour if you want that, now they've rediscovered themselves. And if Clegg had sold his soul to the Tory Right then we really would be screwed, because the Conservatives for the most part do not see Norman Tebbit as the font of all knowledge and policy. The far right of the Conservative party really are a different kettle of fish to the ones in Government. Would you ever have refused to support Tony Blair because you disagreed with Ken Livingstone, or vice versa? Then don't give up on Cameron because of Norman Tebbit
4. Nick Clegg lied to the nation when he said he would not raise tuition fees. Fact: the Liberal Manifesto said that "A Liberal Democrat Government" would not raise tuition fees. And this isn't a Liberal Democrat Government, it is a coalition and in coalition you have to make compromises. It was a stupid thing to promise in their manifesto (since the only defence left to them is that they didn't know they'd be in power when they wrote it) but they didn't lie and if you look at the proposals properly then they do make a lot of sense, especially for those with poorer backgrounds
So go easy on Clegg, yeah? He's not a bastard, just a guy trying to do his job
Wednesday, 6 April 2011
Prison? Me? No Way!
So today's going to be a little wierd. Why? Well to start with we need some background. Warwickshire believes in stopping people from committing crimes when possible, especially young people. So the emergency and justice services run "Prison? Me? No Way!" a day of workshops for year 9 students in schools across the county to dissuade them from committing crimes of any kind. So far so good. These days begin with a fake car crash on the school playground during which one of the occupants dies, leading to the driver being arrested, out on trial and convicted for causing death by dangerous driving. All fine so far. For our school, "Prison? Me? No Way!" is today. Ok. I'm the one who dies in the car.
My morning is going to consist of being soaked in fake blood, sitting in a broken car, having glass smashed over my face, the door cut off with a mechanical saw right next to my leg, being pulled out of the car by a fireman and put in a bodybag for twenty minutes or so. Last year it was a used body bag. Well, a stained one at any rate. It was quite fun last year, and hopefully will be again. Fingers crossed...
My morning is going to consist of being soaked in fake blood, sitting in a broken car, having glass smashed over my face, the door cut off with a mechanical saw right next to my leg, being pulled out of the car by a fireman and put in a bodybag for twenty minutes or so. Last year it was a used body bag. Well, a stained one at any rate. It was quite fun last year, and hopefully will be again. Fingers crossed...
Tuesday, 5 April 2011
Concerning Hobbits
There is only one way to begin a long journey. And that's with this music:
So anyway, as I may have mentioned, I went to London yesterday. This involved waking up at quarter to five in the morning, an ordeal I hope I need not repeat for a good time to come. There was then a long coach journey down to Whitehall, and then we snuck in to the Palace of Westminster (taking the time to explain what it was to one of my friends who has been studying politics for a good couple of years). We had a very nice young man show us around and tell us about everything and then we had a nice chat with our local MP about all sorts of things.
That was my day in Westminster. Far more interesting was the suggestion made by one of my fellow students on the coach that eventually it will become the norm to have a facebook page created for you when you are born that stays with you for life. Whilst an initially terrifying prospect, on reflection this sounds like, not necessarily a "good" idea, but an idea that will become reality the way that we're heading. The world is changing and if you don't keep up you get left behind and I'd really rather not get stuck in 2011. Not since I think I'm already stuck in 1911
So anyway, as I may have mentioned, I went to London yesterday. This involved waking up at quarter to five in the morning, an ordeal I hope I need not repeat for a good time to come. There was then a long coach journey down to Whitehall, and then we snuck in to the Palace of Westminster (taking the time to explain what it was to one of my friends who has been studying politics for a good couple of years). We had a very nice young man show us around and tell us about everything and then we had a nice chat with our local MP about all sorts of things.
That was my day in Westminster. Far more interesting was the suggestion made by one of my fellow students on the coach that eventually it will become the norm to have a facebook page created for you when you are born that stays with you for life. Whilst an initially terrifying prospect, on reflection this sounds like, not necessarily a "good" idea, but an idea that will become reality the way that we're heading. The world is changing and if you don't keep up you get left behind and I'd really rather not get stuck in 2011. Not since I think I'm already stuck in 1911
Sunday, 3 April 2011
I don't blog on Sundays
But this is technically me doing tomorrow morning's post early so that's alright. Anyway, I won't be blogging (genuinely just typed belogging there so sorry about that) tomorrow morning because I am off to London to have a look at where the people who run my life actually run it from.
That's right: This place
That's right: This place
So yeah, that means leaving suspiciously early in the morning to get there so no time to blog tomorrow. You will find out loads more about my quest to the Palace of Westminster on Tuesday I'm sure, so I'll leave it at that for now
Saturday, 2 April 2011
The "Light" Thing
I have a problem with sunlight. Now most people assume that it's just me being weird and that I'm pretending to be a vampire or something but it's not (I may end up pontificating about vampires in another post but the sunlight thing is unrelated.) Now when I say I have a problem with sunlight I don't just mean that I burn easily. That goes without saying; I'm pale skinned and red haired and I burn really really easily. And I don't just mean that, being a geek, I don't see sunlight that often, because I get outside more than you'd think. No, I just mean that the sun itself seems to be out to get me and in a very confusing way.
It's my eyes that have the problem; I just cannot focus my vision while I'm in sunlight. It's alright when I'm not trying to do it, but as soon as I try to keep my eyes open or look at something specific and there is sunlight in that general direction (or even just around) then bamn! I can't look, can barely see, start crying, you name it it happens to me. The really odd thing is that the one exception to this rule is the sun itself. "Don't stare at the sun" people say but the sun is the one thing I can stare at.
But maybe I'm just weird. Yes, that seems likely
It's my eyes that have the problem; I just cannot focus my vision while I'm in sunlight. It's alright when I'm not trying to do it, but as soon as I try to keep my eyes open or look at something specific and there is sunlight in that general direction (or even just around) then bamn! I can't look, can barely see, start crying, you name it it happens to me. The really odd thing is that the one exception to this rule is the sun itself. "Don't stare at the sun" people say but the sun is the one thing I can stare at.
But maybe I'm just weird. Yes, that seems likely
Friday, 1 April 2011
Welcome to April
Yes, welcome to April and to the least interesting day of my year.Why the least interesting you may ask and I shall tell you. It is the least interesting day of my year for a good many reasons, some universal and some specific to me.
Firstly, April Fools Day. How very droll. Doubtless the Guardian will try to print some amusing little story which no-one cares about because the Libyan and Middle Eastern Situations are sort of the only news at the moment and doing an April fool about the fight for freedom would be in very bad taste. Why does no-one ever do anything daring on April Fools Day? I would love, the next time it's on a Wednesday, for the Prime Minister to bring questions in the house forward half an hour and then instead of doing any parliamentary business have the entire house sing this at 11.30 :
But Maybe that's just me
Secondly, today my lessons are going to be somewhere between pointless and silly. First double Politics, usually fine but today we begin to study the great institutions of the European Union. As soon as we can think of them. Until then we'll be looking at the actual institutions so I will just be getting more and more irritated that my life is being run from Brussels when I'd quite like it to be run from the nation I live in and am proud of (which is Britain, not England as I shall explain another time)
Then I have a free period. And no real work to do. I don't have enough room in my bag to bring my coursework for History, I've handed in my English Coursework and don't have any essays to write. If I'm lucky I might be able to break into a free music room and get something done regarding BTEC rehearsing. I'm never lucky.
And after that it's double English. Firstly a Faustus/Pardoner lesson where doubtless we will read the rest of the introduction in the front of our copie of the Pardoner's Tale which have been so helpfully photocopied and handed out to us (we might even finish it, you never know) and then discuss something irrelevant to the course. And then an Othello lesson, which will probably be very fun, and will involve biscuits but will not involve a lot of work. Also, our Othello teacher was ill last lesson and may be again. In which case we will do nothing.
I do have a singing lesson later though, which should make the day a bit more interesting, but generally April Fools Day manages to make any day seem dull for the simple reason that it's meant to make things more interesting, and people just aren't funny any more
But Maybe that's just me
Secondly, today my lessons are going to be somewhere between pointless and silly. First double Politics, usually fine but today we begin to study the great institutions of the European Union. As soon as we can think of them. Until then we'll be looking at the actual institutions so I will just be getting more and more irritated that my life is being run from Brussels when I'd quite like it to be run from the nation I live in and am proud of (which is Britain, not England as I shall explain another time)
Then I have a free period. And no real work to do. I don't have enough room in my bag to bring my coursework for History, I've handed in my English Coursework and don't have any essays to write. If I'm lucky I might be able to break into a free music room and get something done regarding BTEC rehearsing. I'm never lucky.
And after that it's double English. Firstly a Faustus/Pardoner lesson where doubtless we will read the rest of the introduction in the front of our copie of the Pardoner's Tale which have been so helpfully photocopied and handed out to us (we might even finish it, you never know) and then discuss something irrelevant to the course. And then an Othello lesson, which will probably be very fun, and will involve biscuits but will not involve a lot of work. Also, our Othello teacher was ill last lesson and may be again. In which case we will do nothing.
I do have a singing lesson later though, which should make the day a bit more interesting, but generally April Fools Day manages to make any day seem dull for the simple reason that it's meant to make things more interesting, and people just aren't funny any more
Thursday, 31 March 2011
Earning the right to be Brilliant
As I mentioned yesterday, I'm currently a student doing my A levels. And this has led to me thinking a lot about the exam system and the way it all works, especially after last night. For last night was parents evening (yes, we still have parents evenings in sixth form) and the major feedback that I got was "State the obvious". My English teacher summed it up best saying that what I was doing was brilliant but that I had to "Earn the right to be brilliant"
Whilst I understand that it's not them who control things, and I am quite happy to try to down whatever stylistic problems I have, I do have a problem with the philosophy behind it which seems to be emanating from the exam board. "You have to Earn the Right to be Brilliant"? you have to "earn" the right to achieve? You can't just do the best that you can you have to earn the right to do it? Want to make a contribution to society? Well first you have to earn the right to do your best for society
Whilst this annoys me about the exam system I don't really care too much on the basis that it doesn't affect me for much longer, as within the year I will be off at University (as long as I don't screw this one up) and I am assured that one has a lot more freedom there. Once you are at University you have earned the right to be brilliant. But I am very worried that this is an issue that will be emerging from the Big Society.
Those of you who know anything of my politics may well have just spat your tea across the room, so pick up your jaws and let me explain. I believe that the Big Society is an idea which must, for the sake of everyone in this country, succeed. But I fear that it is being stopped by the same philosophy which is frustrating my a levels. "You have to earn the right to be brilliant". You can be a gifted Doctor, a talented Teacher or maybe you are just willing to lend a hand with your local charity. And that's marvellous, and thank you. Thank you so much. But you can't. Not yet. You can't just be brilliant, you have to "earn" the right to be brilliant. Sorry
I'm not saying this is as a result of Government cuts. I've not been "marching for the alternative" because I'm not sure I can see an alternative. But what I can see is regulation, bureaucracy and other hidden obstructions preventing people from helping to build the Big Society, maybe from even wanting to build the Big Society. And I'm not saying I know what should be done to stop this, but something has to be
Whilst I understand that it's not them who control things, and I am quite happy to try to down whatever stylistic problems I have, I do have a problem with the philosophy behind it which seems to be emanating from the exam board. "You have to Earn the Right to be Brilliant"? you have to "earn" the right to achieve? You can't just do the best that you can you have to earn the right to do it? Want to make a contribution to society? Well first you have to earn the right to do your best for society
Whilst this annoys me about the exam system I don't really care too much on the basis that it doesn't affect me for much longer, as within the year I will be off at University (as long as I don't screw this one up) and I am assured that one has a lot more freedom there. Once you are at University you have earned the right to be brilliant. But I am very worried that this is an issue that will be emerging from the Big Society.
Those of you who know anything of my politics may well have just spat your tea across the room, so pick up your jaws and let me explain. I believe that the Big Society is an idea which must, for the sake of everyone in this country, succeed. But I fear that it is being stopped by the same philosophy which is frustrating my a levels. "You have to earn the right to be brilliant". You can be a gifted Doctor, a talented Teacher or maybe you are just willing to lend a hand with your local charity. And that's marvellous, and thank you. Thank you so much. But you can't. Not yet. You can't just be brilliant, you have to "earn" the right to be brilliant. Sorry
I'm not saying this is as a result of Government cuts. I've not been "marching for the alternative" because I'm not sure I can see an alternative. But what I can see is regulation, bureaucracy and other hidden obstructions preventing people from helping to build the Big Society, maybe from even wanting to build the Big Society. And I'm not saying I know what should be done to stop this, but something has to be
Wednesday, 30 March 2011
Who I am and how this came to be
I have absolutely no idea how often I will update this blog or when I will do so, so this entire endevour could go horribly horribly wrong. Or it might not, we'll have to wait and see.
One of the reasons I don't know how often I will update this thing is because I have other things that keep getting in the way of my life. That's a total lie; they are all part of my life. The most prominent of these is Sixth Form, I will tell you about the others at a later date but I'll talk a bit about Sixth Form now.
So I'm in my second (and hopefully final) year of Sixth Form (I say final only in case I fail everything this year). I'm not going to be in Sixth Form for much longer, I think we have something like 31 school days left, and then I will be off into the wide world. But for the moment the things I'm studying are taking up vast amounts of my time so more often than not they will be the things I will write about
You probably ought to be warned what they are, so here we go. I'm studying:
A level Drama and Theatre Studies
A level English Literature
A level Government and Politics
A level History
and BTEC level 3 Music Performance
The BTEC slightly happened by accident; more on that another time.
One of the reasons I don't know how often I will update this thing is because I have other things that keep getting in the way of my life. That's a total lie; they are all part of my life. The most prominent of these is Sixth Form, I will tell you about the others at a later date but I'll talk a bit about Sixth Form now.
So I'm in my second (and hopefully final) year of Sixth Form (I say final only in case I fail everything this year). I'm not going to be in Sixth Form for much longer, I think we have something like 31 school days left, and then I will be off into the wide world. But for the moment the things I'm studying are taking up vast amounts of my time so more often than not they will be the things I will write about
You probably ought to be warned what they are, so here we go. I'm studying:
A level Drama and Theatre Studies
A level English Literature
A level Government and Politics
A level History
and BTEC level 3 Music Performance
The BTEC slightly happened by accident; more on that another time.
Tuesday, 29 March 2011
The Least Interesting Man in the World
"His blog has four posts. All of them apologies for not posting more"
So says XKCD on the subject of the Least interesting man in the world and I pray to God I don't turn into him but I might. So watch out.
(If any of you don't read XKCD by the way, do so, immediately. Click on this to find it --> http://xkcd.com/ )
So anyway, I've just finished doing a play (It was awesome, and I miss it and everyone involved) and so have found myself with a lot of spare time on my hand. A lot of my mind shouted "Revision" at me at this point but a slightly louder, if smaller, portion of my psyche shouted "BLOG" and so that was the part I listened to.
(Writing "Pysche" has made me think of "Psych" which is one of the greatest tv shows ever. Watch it if you don't, it is absolutely hilarious)
So anyway, the plan is to waste my time with this every now and then to give me something to do. Hopefully it will work out ok :-)
P.S. Smileys need noses; depriving them of nasal facilities doesn't accomplish anything
So says XKCD on the subject of the Least interesting man in the world and I pray to God I don't turn into him but I might. So watch out.
(If any of you don't read XKCD by the way, do so, immediately. Click on this to find it --> http://xkcd.com/ )
So anyway, I've just finished doing a play (It was awesome, and I miss it and everyone involved) and so have found myself with a lot of spare time on my hand. A lot of my mind shouted "Revision" at me at this point but a slightly louder, if smaller, portion of my psyche shouted "BLOG" and so that was the part I listened to.
(Writing "Pysche" has made me think of "Psych" which is one of the greatest tv shows ever. Watch it if you don't, it is absolutely hilarious)
So anyway, the plan is to waste my time with this every now and then to give me something to do. Hopefully it will work out ok :-)
P.S. Smileys need noses; depriving them of nasal facilities doesn't accomplish anything
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